Think and then SPEAK

Here are 6 reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great! Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back...or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did...

FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back . My husband didn't say a word...he knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY:
I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."

THIRD TESTIMONY:
My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at
your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically. The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me forget.

FOURTH TESTIMONY:
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that
if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.

FIFTH TESTIMONY:
Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between
errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go
potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said "No". I kept thinking "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied. I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

LAST TESTIMONY:

This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days
and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any! We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did so, too, because they were laughing so hard!

Aaj ki taaza khabar

Just when i thought that it was impossible for me to fall in love again...the phone rang....and it happened....uske baare mein sunte hi usse pyaar ho gaya...just the perfect fit into the family.......ok ok hold your horses....main baat kar raha hoon apni bhanji ki....ji.....my sister has been blessed with a baby girl this morning :)......i dont know how to express it but the feeling is WOW :)

Divide and rule....is not cool

When i was a kid...abt only in 8 or 9th (maybe even younger) my school used to face a college. It was around this time that something happened which left an everlasting impression in my mind...a memory which all of a sudden has been brought out of the heap...The MANDAL COMMISION....it was then that I say a guy burning Himself (GOD rest his soul)....I went home crying and i dont know how many days passed before I could actually understand anything related but all i knew was that kids in the age group 18 -24 were killing themselves in numbers which still brings tears to my eyes....

The Issue...reservation for the SC/ST/OBC students in colleges which combined with already existing reservations for Phsically handicapped, Armed Forces, Freedom fighters and GOD only knows for who all left the students in the general category as the minority eyeing only 47% remaining seats. Thousands dead....millions of crying eyes, broken hearts, shattered parents and a hurt and broken youth had no effect in the hearts/minds (whatever they have...personally I think they possess none) and the act was brought into power. Afsoos

Fast Forward 15 years........

People have merely forgotten Rajiv Goswami when the entire episode is about to repeat...and to hear the youth .....sadly on a much bigger scale..the issue this time ......reservations for the same in Private organisations as well......maane MANDAL COMMISION II......matlab kyon yaar...now now dont get me wrong...am not against the upliftment of these folks but my point is....is this the right way.....suffocating one to get the other some more fresh air when they already have some.....i dont know....look at the percentages which go waste in case of reserved seats and the number of general category students who cud have used them.......do we want to repeat this in jobs too........jeene do yaar......please.......aur kitne Rajiv ke baad inko baat samajh mein aayegi ki vote bank is not the only thing

Some more Calvin

Taking messages the Calvin style

Read and Laugh.....Calvin

· This clean, wholesome television! Ughh, it makes me sick.
· It's not the pace of life I mind. It's the sudden stop at the end.
· So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they're already met?
· Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?
· I asked mom if I was a gifted child. She said they certainly wouldn't have paid for me. You can relate this little story when the reporters ask how I went bad.
· When I grow up, I want to be an inventor. First I will invent a time machine. Then I'll come back to yesterday and take myself to tomorrow and skip this dumb assignment
· I should be doing my homework now. But the way I see it, playing in the snow is a lot more important. Out here I'm learning skills that I can apply throughout the rest of my life - procrastinating and rationalizing
· If something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway
· Given that, sooner or later, we're all going to die, what's the point of learning about integers
· If you do a job badly enough, sometimes you don't get asked to do it again
· It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.
· I like maxims that don't encourage behavior modification
· I don't know which is worse, that everyone has his price, or that the price is always so low.
· In my opinion, television validates existence.
· What's the point of trying if you can't be a winner?
· Why should I have to WORK for everything?! It's like saying I don't deserve.

Yaadein.....

Yaadein..yaadein......baatein beet jaati hain, yaadein yaad aati hain ...yeh yaadein kissi dilo janam ke chale jaane ke baad aati .............

Came across this song while scanning radio channels...and man did this song trigger memories........this past year has been full of exciting, tragic and silent moments ....sometimes the trio showing up all at once.......

Friends moving out to different cities and even different countries.....friends moving away.....re-unions.....surprise phone calls.....miss you cards(ok this one is rare)...thoughtful silences.....rememberances......shy smiles......

What am I trying to say???

Well...I don't know.......in a sense 'am trying to thank the people responsible for these memories.....good or bad.....in the past year I have realised that to me 3 things matter more than anything else in the entire world
My family, my friends, and my colleagues. They have shared their talents and contributed to my life not expecting anything in return.

The one common denominator is people. The material things in my life, nor my actual job have had the most meaning in my life. It is the people in my life that have had the biggest impact and have made the biggest difference in my life.

So Thank U all
for
Just Being There

Tell me why

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Working again

Hey am finally back at work....and it feels teribble ;).... but then this is life and mor commonly the fate shared by around 5 million techies arnd the world. Waise this one week of work made me forget entirely about my vacations...bahut buri halat hai yaar kaam ki :) and uske upar the boss is pathetic.....which reminds me of a forward I received long time back...goes like

Dear Lord I beg you ................

give me wisdom
to understand my boss

Give me love
to forgive him

Give me patience
to understand his actions

But Dear God,
Don't give me strength.

Because if U give me strength,

I Will Break His SKULL. :)